A twenty-something girl's take on the world.

Too old to know better & too young to give a damn.

Imagine how easy life would be if pizza made you skinny.

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10 Reasons why pizza is your best friend.

  1. People disappoint, pizza is eternal.
  2. Pizza has stuck by your side since the beginning… Never once did it flake out on you.
  3. It’s hot deliciousness was one of your all time favorite elementary school memories.
  4. And those days when you had bagel bites after school? Heaven.
  5. Pizza always had your back through puberty… Even when you thought lunchables were the shit.
  6. Pizza pairs great with beer… or wine… or anything, really.
  7. Taco pizza? Breakfast pizza? Pizza’s been there, man.
  8. Pizza will even slather itself in chocolate and change itself into a dessert for you. It just loves you that strongly.
  9. Pizza would never abandon you, no matter how drunk you are…
  10. Pizza is cheap and delicious, the end.

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We ALL love pizza and if you don’t, you’re not human. As a female, kinda wanna look good in a bikini, kinda wanna eat a whole pizza. Realistically, you can’t have both. It’s time to face the music… Summer is right around the corner and this beer/pizza gut has got to go!

I’m a naturally thin person, but I like to eat, a lot. I wish I were as thin as my patience… I eat healthy for a day (don’t work out) and I’m like Omg, where are the results? Why isn’t it working? What do I do? Chill.

You know what really tickles me? When you hear people order a massive amount of unhealthy food, followed by a diet coke. LOL first of all, diet coke is worse for you then regular coke, not that any soda is good for you. Secondly, you just ordered a quarter pounder with a large fry… I hate to break it to ya, that “diet” soda isn’t saving you, but go on wit’cha bad self. Also, maybe educate yourselves on what soda actually consists of… gross.

Nobody wants to hear about your diet and how sad you are that your drinking green shit for breakfast and eating almonds for dinner. Diets suck, give me a donut. I feel like there’s a negative stipulation that comes with the word diet. Personally, I refuse to “diet.” Those get skinny quick diets are a load of crap and usually a temporary fix. I like to call it “clean eating” or “watching what I eat.” There’s really not much to it. It’s all about portion size. We all like to indulge, but there’s a fine line between indulging and over-indulging. You don’t have to give up pizza, but instead of eating the whole pie, like I tend to do, eat one slice. Instead of munching on a bag of doritos, have a handful of bean chips. There’s pretty much a healthier alternative for everything, you just have to look.

I try to eat organic, when I can. I don’t like to eat processed food, injected with a bunch of chemicals that I can’t even pronounce. Yes, it’s a tad pricey, but it’s worth it! In 10 years, when you’re all dying of terrible disease traced back to pesticides from your McDonalds “chicken” nuggets, i’ll be over here like, told ya so.


My favorite healthy snacks.

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Trust me, I realize none of these live up to pizza’s expectations, but here are a few of my go-to snacks…

1. Yogurt covered frozen blueberries.

2. Frozen dark chocolate dipped almond butter banana bites.

3. White cheddar popcorn… Surprisingly not bad for you, just don’t eat the whole bag!

4. Bean chips & hummus… How much easier can it get?

5. Kale chips… You can find them in Trader Joe’s, Whole Foods or you can make your own!

6. Stuffed tomato… Made with either chicken or tuna salad.

7. Cucumbers soaked in lemon juice, olive oil, salt and pepper… Let cucumbers soak for 24 hours before eating!

8. Celery with almond butter and raisins… “Ants on a log.”

9. Rice cakes covered with almond butter and sliced banana… Heaven in your mouth!

10. Fresh fruits/veggies.

Most are pretty self-explanatory, but if you’re interested in any recipes, let me know! 

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